As I lifted my head off of the pillow, I heard the following tape play between my ears. “Good morning Agent Mommy. This message comes at a particularly difficult time. The school year is ending, your employment situation is fluctuating, a multigenerational celebration is mere weeks away, and your family has been threatened by a gang of dumpster cats specializing in precision assassinations.
“Agent Computer Cowboy has already been redirected to the Indian Subcontinent for purposes of income. Agent Missy Older has been aimed at completing her year’s worth of qualifying exams and at finding volunteer work for the summer. You are on your own. Control believes that you, the Indomitable Mommy Force, are perfect for this job.
“Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is: to properly medicate, with tea and with herbs, the small child in the family’s therapeutic facility; to sort out the rest of the household, from the morning’s first wash to the previous evening’s last load of dishes; to get the children to school; and, most importantly, to make a drop, of packets of celebration announcements, in another neighborhood. All tasks must be completed within the two hour time window between these words and the start of your work day. Should you fail, headquarters will deny any knowledge of you or of your assignment.
“This tape will destruct your day all by itself. Good luck Agent Mommy.”
